The Mortgage Mole

Super Bowl
The Mortgage Strategy crew went bowling last week courtesy of Home of Choice. After Strategy’s recent triumph in the alleys against BM Solutions, expectations were high but sadly, ace hack Rebecca took things a little too seriously. Never the most coordinated of individuals she hurled the ball as hard as she could, forgetting to let go. A messy collision halfway down the alley ensued, although ironically this was her best shot of the game.

Fortunately, deputy features editor Barney bowled to the rescue, more than making up for the rest of the crew’s dismal performance. Going for MS pride and honour he scooped the prize for the highest individual score, with a whopping 146 points.

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Inspiration and opportunity knocks every day – literally for HoC managing director Richard Coulson. He tells Mole that he’s been inspired by his postwoman Dorothy and intends to one day take up the bike and bag to become a postie himself.

Clogging off It was a return to the briny for Robert ‘Hello sailor’ Thickett last week courtesy of those nice folks at Northern Rock. Salty buccaneer Francis Mogg from Northern Rock was keen to race in this year’s Scandia Cowes week but the winds and Thickett were against him. Mogg was forced to retire the boat midway through the race, retreating to the comfort of a nearby pub. Mogg sobbed to Mole over a pint: “It was the boy’s shoes that were the problem. He wouldn’t shut up about how his clogs were perfect for sailing. Talk about style over content.”

Let it bee Mole was hobnobbing with the rich and shameless last week at the Cartier Polo World Cup match in Windsor. Invited by Advantage, Mole felt very much at home with the ‘it’ girls and minor aristos in attendance but sadly some of our party were rather more ruffled by the experience. Alana, from Mortgage Strategy’s sales department, drenched everyone around her with Pimms while trying to use her glass to bludgeon a bee to death.

“It pains me to say it but polo simply isn’t what it used to be,” editor Robyn Hall tells Mole. “They let anyone in these days.”

Golden State BM Solutions held its masquerade ball charity auction last week. A number of highly prized items were up for grabs, in particular the opportunity to edit the mighty Mortgage Strategy for a week.

With a rival mortgage magazine bidding to edit MS, the price quickly jumped to 3,500. Fortunately The Mortgage Business triumphed. The auction was hosted by Mr Perma Tan himself, TV’s David Dickinson. With managing director of HBOS Mortgage Intermediaries’ Nigel Stockton’s Hollywood smile and Dickinson’s Hollywood tan Mole almost believed he was in California. Pity he was in Birmingham.