View more on these topics

The Mortgage Mole

Sporting glory
Mole racked his brains this week at the Tommy’s Sports Quiz at The Brewery in the City of London, courtesy of Chelsea and finished a wholly respectable 10th out of 24 teams.

As well as rubbing shoulders with sporting luminaries including British sprinter Darren Campbell and former Arsenal defender Nigel Winterburn, Mole was treated to the amusing sight of PR guru Max Clifford attempting to dance to Mylo. Think of your most embarrassing uncle dancing at a wedding and you’re halfway there.

Chelsea PRs Susie Ratcliffe and Jeremy Hicks also got into the swing of things – the former after recovering from a tantrum thrown after realising BBC Holiday presenter Craig Doyle wouldn’t be compering the evening and the latter after inadvertently daubing himself with glitter after fondling a table decoration. It’s a sporting life.

Service with a smile
Mortgage Strategy received a spoof lending service update last week, entitled ‘Suckers update’. The missive highlighted the fact that brokers have had enough of empty promises. It says: “Please note that our telephone lines are open 9am to 5pm Monday to Friday. No one will pick up the phone, but were there anyway.

“Our call centre will handle calls where monkeys will be on hand to gorge on rotten fruit.

“Your local business development manager and packaging manager have given up the will to live and gone to the local lap dancing establishment.”

Wannabe Hollyoaks starlet and MS reporter Luci Mylward has confessed to Mole she has yet more celebrity skeletons in her closet. Many moons ago in a bar in Newcastle the blonde bombshell nearly got into a catfight with none other than Girls Aloud warbler Cheryl Tweedy. The kick-off occurred after Tweedy invited Mylward’s now ex-boyfriend back to her place for “a nice cup of tea”. Understandably, Mylward took back what was hers and made a speedy exit.

Mylward confessed to Mole: “Two seconds longer and I would have punched her. The worst bit was in my haste to get away I left half a pint of Newky Brown and a packet of pork scratchings on the bar – what a waste!”

Knight of the night
The industry’s finest were out in force last week for the annual Hamptons International Awards Dinner. Following the awards celebrations it was off to London’s exclusive China Whites nightclub.

Celeb stalker and gatecrasher Natalie was more than happy after seeing James Alexandrou, a.k.a. Martin Fowler off Eastenders, at the bar.

After partying hard, senior hackette Natalie was relieved to be offered a helping hand from Platform’s Guy Batchelor who kindly made sure she got home OK, proving that chivalry still exists in the mortgage industry.


MPLC, not anti cascade systems

Mortgages PLC has clarified its stance regarding cascade underwriting following a press release issued last week in which it urged intermediaries to exercise caution when using cascade systems. The lender has also received a number of messages of support from key distributors in the market, including Pink, Genesis, and Enterprise.Peter Beaumont, sales & marketing director […]

Economic Lifestyle challenges providers to improve product terms & conditions

Economic Lifestyle is challenging other equity release providers to improve the terms and conditions of their products as it launches its cash release plan, a fully portable and flexible reversion scheme available for customers aged 60 and over.The retirement housing and finance specialist believes poor sales of reversion plans in comparison with lifetime mortgage schemes […]

Clydesdale named best overall mortgage lender

Clydesdale Bank has been named best overall mortgage lender at the Hamptons Mortgage awards ceremony, within a year of entering the mortgage intermediary market. The award was presented at the Hamptons awards ceremony at The Cafe Royal in London on Thursday November 24. Kevin Lilley, head of national accounts for third party distribution at Clydesdale […]

FSA warns consumers over illegal self-cert

The Financial Services Authority has warned consumers not to inflate their income to get a self-certification mortgage as they risk getting a criminal record.The FSA’s new mortgage website explains to consumers that they could be committing fraud, as well as being left with a loan they cannot afford, if they overstate their salary.To help consumers […]

A guide to auction finance in 2017

By Matt Tooth, chief commercial officer, LendInvest Over the coming weeks, property auction houses across the country will begin sending out their catalogues to prospective buyers in time for the first auction series of 2017. It’s an exciting time for investors, well aware of the opportunities the properties on the lot sheets offer them and […]


News and expert analysis straight to your inbox

Sign up