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The Mortgage Mole

OLD SALTS Ah, a life on the ocean wave and MS&#39s annual fishing trip proved once more that the industry&#39s finest have the stomach for it.

“I can&#39t believe no one was sick,” Pink&#39s Dev Malle told Mole. “Who in their right mind would go out the night before an 8.30am start, get blind drunk and then throw themselves on the mercy of the tide?” Well, aside from Dev, that would be Alan Cleary, Peter Charge, Terry Pritchard, Payam Azadi, Lockhart Bruce, Kevin Friend and Paul Hunt. Say no more.

POLE DANCERS Not that Mole ever needs an excuse to get out on the lash but the coming of Strategy&#39s third birthday was as sure fire an excuse as any to celebrate. And so it was that Mole roared on the Three Lions boys from the terraces as England got their World Cup qualifying campaign back on track with a hard-earned win against Poland in Katowice last week.

Off the pitch, Mole had less success in trying to find a club in which to celebrate the victory. On asking various cab drivers to be dropped off at a &#39discotheque&#39, Mole and The Finance Centre partner Wayne Smethurst found themselves delivered to a selection of more dubious establishments where there were certainly plenty of Poles dancing.

CLEARY VIEW Back in Blighty it was more of the same after an entertaining evening courtesy of Pink Home Loans and later the ever-amiable Alan Cleary of BM Solutions fame at Birmingham&#39s exclusive Petit Blanc restaurant.

Quite what Cleary was thinking after retiring from the Living Room is anyone&#39s guess but suffice to say that as ever it was an Extreme thought that almost went the distance.

But with a golf day at the fittingly named Seedy Mill Golf Club due to begin at 9am sharp it was early doors come 5am.

BUM NOTE Continuing the entertainment, it was down to Skipton&#39s media guru Matthew Cox to prove to Mole that he really is the Skipton Karaoke Champion. Egged on by deputy ed Gallagher and features supremo McCormick, Cox and boss Jennifer Holloway alongside intermediary development manager Paul Darwin headed off to Soho&#39s Karaoke Box.

And soon enough all the classics were belted out, though Mole did start to worry when Cox started to demonstrate his moves to Dirty Dancing&#39s I&#39ve Had the Time of My Life.

BOOK STALLED Meanwhile, still no buyer for the AMI&#39s guide to FSA regulation. The book has been on eBay for two weeks and still no takers. Things did hot up briefly in the closing stages of week one when six bids sent the price spiralling to a dizzy £6 but for a website that recently flogged a bucket of horse dung for £760 it&#39s a bit of a shock. Mole wonders whether our mystery vendor is getting worried.

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