The Mortgage Mole

Melody Massacre – Mole got some practice in for the festive carol singing with a karaoke night arranged by Skipton in London’s Chinatown last week. Arriving fashionably late and well oiled after a long liquid lunch, courtesy of those kind folk at GE, the Strategy staffers were soon belting out the hits with scant regard for their throats – or the eardrums of those who had to endure the cacophony.

Worst offender was ace reporter Rebecca Atkinson whose wrecking of a string of once-loved classics had the assembled company running for cover. So much so that even Skipton’s own PR gnus were overheard calling her performance “dreadful”. Such fun was had by all that ed Robyn and features man Barney both fell asleep on the way home and spent rather longer than they should have done getting home. Hic!

Ami-Go – With news that Ben Stafford is to leave the Association of Mortgage Intermediaries for pastures new at the Association of British Insurers Mole was left wondering if his old mate and former MS news editor ever did get around to completing his CeMap. “Of course I did you cheeky git,” Stafford piped up. “Obviously I’m going to be doing my Flawed Personal Characteristics exam next.”

Balls Up – And so to West London and on the same night that Liverpool took on Chelsea in one of football’s most boring ever encounters, another dull affair was taking place in the Hammersmith Novotel where the industry’s finest were out for the Council of Mortgage Lenders annual dinner. And what a mess it was. The theme of the evening was ‘football fever’ but Mole suspects there were a few lenders leaving with green fever after sampling the evening’s food. Culinary delights included rocket, apple and balsamic vinegar sorbet and red peppers in jelly.

Mole suggests the CML carries out its next report into the cost of such poorly organised events.

Smash – They say he is a man of steel. Others call him The Gnu. Some know him simply as God. He is, of course, Richard Hurst, PR maestro and wannabe chief executive of the not-so-worldwide global communications empire that is RCH Communications. But as Mole’s shock snap shows, the Hurstmeister truly is indestructible. Earlier this month the PR nut was travelling back in his Porsche 911 from a BDS bash in Southampton to Guildford. But heavy rain and 70mph in the outside lane of the M3 don’t mix.

And so it was that Hurst hit the slick and his beloved 911 aquaplaned into a spin, smashed into the central barrier, careered back across three lanes and slammed into a barrier on the hard shoulder where it finally came to rest , leaving Hurst to stroll off without a scratch. “What can I say,” Hurst told Mole. “I told you I was a God. Here’s the proof.” Indeed.